A Man Named Jim

I've decided to start blogging more. I miss writing for me. This post is about an incident that made me proud of the person I've become and reminded me of the reason I love my job, the company I work for, and for my understanding of gospel principles. This story is about a man named.

I live in Monrovia, a charming city in the foothills of southern California. To avoid the commute traffic of our overcrowded freeways, I often take side streets to get home. On this particular Friday evening I noticed that traffic was extremely heavy, with cars backed up for about a two miles. As I slowly made my way up the hill to my house, I noticed an elderly man about 70 or so walking with a younger woman. My eyes caught a quick glimpse of a little red plastic object that the gentleman was carrying. Thirty yards up the street was an older model pick up truck with its hazard blinkers on. That's when the realization hit me that this older man had run out of gas and was attempting to walk down the hill to get gas from the chevron station about 2 miles down the road. Possible yes, going downhill wouldn't have been too hard, but the walk back UP the hill would have been difficult for anyone, not to mention someone in his seventies. Without a whole lot of hesitation, I did that thing my parents said I was never to do and whipped around the block to meet this man and lady at the corner and picked up a stranger. How dangerous could they be at there age?

Calling out my passenger window, I asked if they would like a ride to the gas station, to which the lady said, "Yes HE would". Turns out she was just trying to direct him towards a nearby bank. The man got in my car and introduced himself as "Jim". Jim said he needed to find a wells Fargo bank to get some money, so I went around the block, passing his broken down truck for a second time, as he started in to his touching story and the circumstances that led up to that moment. Jim told me he was on his way home from an appointment for a potential opportunity to do some handyman work fell to the wayside when the prospective client blew him out. He stopped at a gas station only to have his ATM card declined. Upon calling the bank, he learned they had put a five-day hold on the six hundred dollar government check he received for his wife's death benefits. Jim knew he had $4.00 in an account at Wells Fargo and was planning to go close out his account to get some gas money. My heart ached for his plight and my mind started calculating how long I would have to wait to have him close his account only to yield $4 bucks. It didn't take me long to figure out the right thing to do was to just buy this guy a tank of gas. 

On the way to the gas station I asked Jim when his wife had passed, to which he explained she died two years prior after loosing a battle with breast cancer which was diagnosed only after having progressed to stage four. After a few minutes of conversation, Jim asked me what I did for a living. I explained that I worked for Kaiser Permanente leading a preventive screening program that ensures our patients get the screenings they need to help prevent and diagnose cancer and other chronic conditions before they become a concern. Jim was quiet for a minute which made me think I had gone to techie with my description, but he broke the silence with a simple yet sincere comment that came out more like a statement than a question. Looking me in the eyes, he said thoughtfully "maybe if we had Kaiser they would have caught my wife's cancer in time." Fighting back the emotion that filled me, I looked at Jim and replied, "I like to believe that we would have.”

By the time we pulled in to the gas station I had made up my mind that I was not going to let this sweet man go with just a gallon of gas. I explained to Jim in a very determined voice that I had a plan. After I dropped him off with his emergency gas I wanted him to follow me back to the gas station so I could put some more gas in his truck because there was NO way his old truck was going to make it very far on a gallon of gas. Jim was stunned, but grateful. "How can I ever repay you?” I looked at him sincerely and said "you don't, you just pay it forward sometime to someone else who needs it". Jim smiled and agreed wholeheartedly. 

After fighting our way back through the traffic I pulled up behind Jim's truck and turned on my hazard signals. Jim poured the gas in his truck, carefully trying not to spill a drop, and then jumped in the truck to start it up. Sadly, nothing happened. Jim took a water bottle out, popped his hood, poured what was left in the bottle into his radiator, and then tried to start it up again.   Still... it wouldn't turn over.  A defeated Jim walked over to my car and said, "I guess we're out of luck.  I think I need to be jump started, but I don't have any jumper cables."  I smiled, thinking of the jumper cables my husband put in an emergency kit in my trunk so I would "always be prepared."  Getting Jim's truck started was no longer an act of charity; it was a MISSION!  We were going to get this truck started if we to stay their all night.   Using my crazy mad woman driving skills, I pulled in to the traffic that was creeping past Jim's truck, ignoring the honking horns coming from frustrated drivers, and flipped a u-turn so I could face Jim's truck and we could hook up the cables.   Hooking up the cables to my new Cadillac proved a chore in itself because every component of the engine is covered so it looks sleek and clean under the hood.   Finally, we found the right panel to move aside and Jim hooked up the cables.   Excited emanated from every pore as we stared at each other over our steering wheels and waited for the sound that was music to our ears.  We were so ecstatic that we were giving each other high fives in the middle of Foothill Blvd!  It was the most amazing rush of joy and satisfaction :-)

Our journey wasn't over yet though, we still had to make it to the gas station.  I lead the way keeping my eyes focused between the road and my rear view mirror, praying his old truck would sputter it's way over to the gas station down the road.  At last, we made it!  Now a whole new struggle began.  Getting Jim to allow me to FILL his tank with gas instead of just putting in the $20 we agreed upon.  It took some gentle, but aggressive persuasion and a story about how I had just had a promotion, which came with a raise, and I wanted to share my blessings.  (Okay, so the promotion and raise part happened about 8 months earlier - but he didn't need to know that)  I had to keep Jim distracted with conversation as the total sale ticker crept up to $70.  He tried to stop me twice, but us short women are also very stubborn.   When we finished filling up his truck, I gave him what we call a "pass along card" that provides information on how to get a hold of missionaries to receive a Bible and a Book of Mormon.   Jim read the card and smiled a beautiful smile and said "You're Mormon?  Now it all makes sense!"  Then he asked if he could give me a hug to which I accepted with open arms. 

Driving home I was so excited over my amazing experience that I wanted to share it with the world.  You see... Jim thinks I was the one who was the giver, but in my eyes, it was me who was receiver.  Jim reminded me of how wonderful it feels to serve others, to give freely without the expectation of reciprocation, to place your trust in someone else to help share your burdens, and to rejoice in the work that I am honored to do because I have the ability to help save lives every day.  I'll never forget that day or the wonderful man named Jim. 

Giving

"If you knew what I know about the power of giving, you would not let a single meal pass without sharing it in some way." Buddha

"Give what you have. To someone, it may be better than you dare to think." 

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

"Have I Done Any Good in the World Today?"

I stopped at WalMart on my way home from work tonight for some quick groceries and was approached by a lady with her two children who looked to be about 9 and 13. They were asking for money for food. The son, who seemed about 9 years old, was helping to translate what sounded like Hindu to English for his mother.  The daughter, who was about 13, kept her eyes averted away from me.  Part of me thought "oh man... "another beggar scam asking me to share my hard earned money", while, thankfully, the other side of me said "who am I to judge if this request is honest".

I offered them a box of granola bars that I had just bought, assuming they would just chuck it aside since it wasn't the money for which they asked. To my surprise and self shame, the mother had that box opened before I could pull out of my spot and was divvying up the granola bars for her kids, saving one for herself. The scene almost haunted me as I pulled away, knowing that my own kids would never even miss the box of granola bars.  Before I left the parking lot my heart and conscious brought me to my senses and turned me around to find them once more.  Lowering my car window, I reached out to give this needy family some money.  The mother looked at me as only a mother could, making eye  contact; mother to mother.  Quietly, she said the most sincere "thank you".  It nearly broke my heart.


As I drove home with my milk, bread, and Hostess Ding Dongs, the scene which had unraveled before me slowly started to sync in... the desperate plea of a mother, the gentle inquiry of a young boy, and the averted eyes of teenage girl who seemed to want to hide from life's circumstances.


May we all find room in our hearts to be grateful for all we have and remember to share with others what ever we can without judgment or question.

Matt

In you I see great strength
In character and will
I see a stand up young man
Who just tries to keeps it real
In you I see such depth
A soul that's young and old
One who can see beneath stories
For the truths yet to be told
In you I see a writer
Who scripts his own destiny
By believing in the power
Of becoming who you wish to be
In you I see honor and pride
Which is never righteous or proud
Your values are your armor
Which cover you like a shroud
In you I see the face of Christ
Wronged, but who kept forgiving
Your pain and scars are gentle reminders
The inspiration for the life you're living
In you I see a quiet reflection
Yet I wonder if you'll ever believe
How beautiful you truly are
So you'll appreciate the things in you I see

SISTERS

She is your mirror, shining back at you with a world of possibilities. She is your witness, who sees you at your worst and best, and loves you anyway. She is your partner in crime, your midnight companion, someone who knows when you are smiling, even in the dark. She is your teacher, your defense attorney, your personal press agent, even your shrink. Some days, she's the reason you wish you were an only child. ~Barbara Alpert
 

"With a little time, and a little more insight, we begin to see both ourselves and our enemies in humbler profiles. We are not really as innocent as we felt when we were first hurt. And we do not usually have a gigantic monster to forgive; we have a weak, needy, and somewhat stupid human being. When you see your enemy and yourself in the weakness and silliness of the humanity you share, you will make the miracle of forgiving a little easier."

Celebrating Nana's Life

Bertha Maude Whittier, born on August 23, 1912 in Trout Lake, Washington and one of 13 children born to the late Robert and Susan Myers, passed peacefully on April 2, 2010 at the age of 97 after a quiet visit with her family.

Bertha was a beloved mother and grandmother who opened her heart, her arms, and home to family and friends in need. She knew how to love freely and give generously. Bertha, known as “Nana” to all of her grandchildren, enjoyed writing letters to keep in touch with all of her relatives. The main love of Bertha’s life was Jack Bonito. He taught her how to square dance and they loved to travel in their motor home together. Jack died over 20 years ago. When he left, a piece of her heart went with him. We know that Jack and other family members were waiting to take her in to their arms and that missing piece of her heart was made whole again when she crossed the veil.

Bertha will be forever remembered by her daughters, Roberta Meditz and Bonnie Iwanski and their spouses Dave Meditz and Mike Iwanski, as well as her devoted grandchildren, Robert Robertson, Phillip Cooper, Kellie Saver, Kimberlie Howell, Kristen Andrews, and Kathy Geer. Bertha is also survived by 11 great grandchildren, and 2 great, great grandchildren.

Nana Letters Update

I received a letter from nana and I was actually thrilled to know she was still alive. Sounds pathetic and aweful that I wasn't sure, but I'm not sure my crazy aunt Berta would inform us if she passed on. Nana will be 98 this year and except for writing the same thing over 3 separate times, in the same letter, she is still hanging in there. This letter she spoke about breaking out of the home she is in and coming up to Los Angeles to stay with us "folk up here". Scary thing is, even though she is bedridden, I don't put it past her one bit. She is a fiesty young lady held captive inside an old woman's body. I would like to take a road trip to Oregon and visit with her before it's too late, but she has moved herself out to the backwoods of Oregon where no planes fly in to. I pretty sure she knows how much I love her, but that can't replace the loneliness she must feel being cooped up in an elderly home 24/7.

"In youth the days are short and the years are long; in old age the years are short and the days long." ~Nikita Ivanovich Panin

11-5-09

Friday was one of those amazing days where I spent the entire day racking my brain with strategy and processes; in a room with co-workes who help inspire forward thinking and change and at the end of the day, my body was tired, yet my mind and spirit were rejuevenated. wow... I actually get paid for this stuff.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same."


“The past is our definition. we may strive, with good reason, to escape it, or to escape what is bad in it, but we will escape it only by adding something better to it.”

"The strength of a family, like the strength of an army, is in its loyalty to each other."

"There is no doubt that it is around the family and the home that all the greatest virtues, the most dominating virtues of human society, are created, strengthened and maintained."

"For those who believe, no proof is necessary. For those who don't believe, no proof is possible."

been a while

It's been a while since I've been on here. Today was my first official day in my new job, even though they started paying me for the new role two weeks ago. I'm soooo close to loosening the bonds of my previous job. I just need to keep hanging in.

So much to be grateful for... family, friends, work, health

I am so blessed.

Reflections of Christ - A beautiful video

http://www.reflectionsmg.com/

The Nana Letters - January 29, 2009

Before I add this letter I have to admit how impressed I am by our Postal Service that I ever received it in the first place. Nana has obviously run out of the pre-stamped, self-addressed envelopes that I sent her last year. The envelope looks like it was gift wrapped in about 46 1 cent stamps and was almost completely sealed except for the area where she put my address. My address has NO zip code and a City named Montorvical - instead of Monrovia. My husband laughed when he saw and said it was time to resend nana some envelopes - sounds like she's had to much frosting in her morning frosted flakes. LOL Gotta love her! So the next letter which just arrived starts with me asking questions and her providing answers. I've started working on our geneology and want to get more of the storys behind our family lines. - KA

Q. I heard you used blue chip stamps to go to the world's fair with your sister. Can you tell me more about this adventure?
A. Yes, it was great. Gladys' husband only wanted one thing! To be left to play in his garden! Gladys was wonderful! We had saved up enough of our blue chip stamps to pay for the whole trip. We felt so strong and independent going off on our own. One of the greatest times I remember. We lived in an old house and only fruit we had was apricots and a few peaches that mother had canned. Gladys bought us some oranges. What a treat!

Q. Tell me about one of the sweetest moments of your life that you never want to forget
A. The day Jack and I went to Los Vegas and I won $100 and thought it was the most wonderful day! As we grew up on the farm, even a dime was a treasure. Mother and Dad eventually moved to town and went on welfare. They were so sonservative and always seem to have plenty. I think it was so embarrasing to Dad and he soon died.

Q. Tell me a little about Bob Cooper. I know he was your second husband after your first marriage to Donald Mosier quickly annulled. I don't feel like I knew him well because he died when I was young. Jack will always be my grandfather in my mind and heart.

A. Bob was stern! His name was actually John Thomas (after an uncle). He said he wwas in 7 different countries in World War 1. He is buried in the veterans cemetary in San Bruno, Ca. After he died, Bonnie, your mother, told me I couldn't just moyse around all the day, I had to do something. So I went back to college in my 70's. I think I was the oldest lady in those classes. That's when I met Jack and he thought I should learn to square dance and he'd be my partner. It took a long time to remember the calls so I was slow and ever square dance he'd say, "You've got to remember! You can do this!" Jack was such a good dancer; I was so afraid I'd loose him untilhe said "Let's go to Vegas!" He had a practically new car so we went and he surprised me by getting a marriage liscense and we got married. He had his own barber shop. Eventually he let the lease give out and he went to work near Sunnyside for Lucille's husband, Ralph, who had a barber shop. Shortly after we were married a doctor told him he had cancer in his stomach. The Dr. said Jack probably wouldn't live til the end of the year. We heard of someone who got better after he took Laetrill, a drug bought in mexico for treating cancer and tumors. So we drove to Mexico and got $400 worth of latrill(came from Germany) First he had to have shots and since we couldn't stay in Mexio, they taught me and I gave him a shot 3 x's daily in his vein. I was scared beyound reason, but I did it. After about 8 or 10 days he only had to take pills. He was so much better, and did well for years, but eventually, he said his legs just wouldn't hold him up anymore. We were both getting small amounts of social security be he eventually ran out of pills and he just quit. It was a big worry to go to Mexico. Always afraind at the border. We always hid the medicine in our clothes when coming home. He lived to 81 years and at that time, it was a good age, 20 years longer than the other doctor had predicted.

Q. I know you think of Jack often. What is the one thing you would want to do with Jack if you could be presented to him once again?
A. Just let him hold me

Q. You know, watching the two of you get dressed up to go dancing was always fun for me. You both looked so stunning in your square dance outfits. I remember that Kathy and I even got to go with you to a Square Dance. I loved watching Jack gently lead and guid you through each step. He seemed so gentle and looked at you so very lovingly. There was a sense of security that I found within your home, your arms, and your love.

Jack always had a way of making us feel special; taking us out to the shooting range to teach us how to load, hold, and fire a gun. After we would finish shooting, he would have us go around the range gathering up the gun shells, then, when we got back to the house he would show us how to repack the bullets. Jack bought me my first car, and then he showed me how to change the oil and how to put batteries cables that came disconnected back on again. I didn't get it then, but as a parent it makes sense. He wanted to make sure I would know what to do if a boy tried to trick me into a make-session because the car wouldn't start.

Did you know that whenever we would go into Jack's barber shop to see him, he would grin, smack us with a rolled up newspaper and then give us a can of toffee peanuts sold by the YMCA. Inside the can, he would hide a silver dollar or another rare coin. The peanuts were great, but the surprise was even better. What a sweet treat! You and Jack were always there for us to demonstrate love, charity, service, and compassion on a daily basis to those in need. Thank you for that.
A. I didnt know he did the thing with the peanuts. He loved you girls like his own. I miss him so.

Q. Are you still trying to sneak out of the board and care house to get your own place. You know, I think you might be better off just staying were you are. At least you won't have to worry about social services harrassing you.
A. I live in a board and care home. Have a room by myself and they make all the meals. I want to get my own apt again, but the 3 inches of snow is discouraging. The buses are running again. I'll write if I move. Now I'm 96 and expected to go over 100. Fern, my sister, was 14 days over 100. She just lost all ambition or desire. Her son took care of her. Roberta took me to her funeral. Roberta is so good to me. She works but somehow managers to see me about 1/week.

Well, thanks for your paper. I had leonard's old typewriter and I used it for important paper, but Roberta came down and cleaned out my place when I fell and she took me to her house for awhile. So I just plain lost a lot of stuff. Another, Oh Well!!! I watch these dog sleds in Alaska on TV and they are wonderful. You have to pay extra to get CNN up here. When we paid our rent here last month, we had to pay $10 extra for TV. Another oh well!!! So live goes on!! Thanksf ort he letter - so great of you! Tell all the family hello and I love them too.

Lovingly,
Nana